Laughter, Nature's Healing Medicine For the Soul-- by Matthew T. Mruzek

I am sure Deepak Chopra would agree that laughter is good medicine for the soul. Here is one way to get a good dose of soul sustaining medicine at your next band practice.

Go to Wal-Mart. Find the cash register where the store sells cigarettes and liquor, and buy a 5th of Jack Daniels Tennessee whiskey. Next, go to Tim Horton's and order a large double double. Drink this coffee as fast as you can.

When you feel the urge to use the bathroom, take the bottle of whiskey in with you.  Dump the contents of the bottle down the drain or the toilet. You can now proceed to fill the bottle up with your own urine. Don't forget, it is very important to allow the bottle to reach room temperature, or simply let the bottle chill in the freezer for an hour or so before it's time to jam!

Now casually sip the bottle of frosty chilled urine in front of your band members. This may not seem very appealing, but this is good practice in case you are ever trapped in the desert and need to conserve fluids. Urine is a completely sterile substance.

When you sense that the members of your band are beginning to feel envious of your foresight to bring alcohol to practice, offer them a drink. You may want to think of any lost love, deceased relative or childhood pet to keep from laughing before the big moment. Once your targeted band member has sipped from the bottle, it is now appropriate to laugh!

If you are concerned about being kicked out of the band after this incident, it is a good idea to own your own rehearsal space, so you can try out new members, and have fun with the same gag all over again!

Remember, drinking alcohol is for losers anyways.

---Matthew T. Mruzek MD


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